By the time this year’s Contest rolls around the greatest ever Eurovision interval act, Love Love Peace Peace, will turn five years old. Yes I said what I said, pipe down Riverdance. Here we are still weeks away from the end of this year’s season and, even with a reduced number of shows, it seems the LLPP playbook got a thorough fingering.
Step 1: Grab everyone’s attention, a powerful majestic start.
Look no further than our very first national final of the season, Albania’s Festivali i Këngës. Although she’s lacking the horn (don’t!) there is still plenty of drama and power to the start of Era Rusi’s Zjarri Im.
Step 2: Drums! There has to be drums! It doesn’t hurt if the drums are played by gorgeous topless men. It’s proven very efficient throughout the years.
Luckily Era’s also got us covered in that department too. Although not drumming, we still saw the topless accoutrements in France as well. You could either plump for the Tahitian or the Scottish topless blokes, it really was your choice. Basically, if it’s torso’s you’re after then 2021 had you covered. Unlike said torsos.
Step 3! Show the viewers your country’s ethnic background by using an old traditional folklore instrument that no-one’s heard of before.
In the song it was the Swedish kvinnaböske, a small roundish piece from the horn family, inherited from the Vikings. In 2021 courtesy of TuVeia and their song Bli med meg på gar’n we see the Norwegian skitten vits. A traditional long horn known to bring pleasure to many.
Step 4: In Eurovision, nothing says winner like a violin. Trust us – bring a violin.
And what country screams “bringing violin to Eurovision”? That’s right, the string stanning Norway were at it again. There is in fact plenty of violin all the way through the farm caper above. Just a shame the poor dear was stuck in a tractor for the majority of proceedings. Though he may have been dressed like a little cock-en-ney urchin, Ole Hartz also brought all the Norwegian strings you could possibly wish for in Vi er Norge
Step 5! The violin, the drums and the kvinnaböske might make it all feel a little bit old fashioned, but this can easily be fixed by adding a DJ who pretends to scratch. In real life of course, this is thirty years old but in Eurovision, it will give your number a contemporary feel
…and in the case of France why not stick a lovely, lovely horse head on him.
Step 6 – costumes! You need to look memorable, something that the viewers will notice.
Only three words needed for this one: Big. Daddy. Karsten.
Honourable mentions should go to Black Spikes in Lithuania, Danny Saucedo in Sweden, Kastro Zizo in Albania and Nina Kraljic in Croatia for their interesting fashion choices too.
But as Petra says herself , “Everything else might be important, but the song is essential.”. Although we’ve seen all the tricks from the LLPP script, all these entries (with exception of Danny Saucedo) have fallen by the wayside. The song will always be the most important thing if you’re trying to win Eurovision. Unless it’s 2011. That’s still a mystery.