Consider one of two scenarios. The BMG partnership has worked wonders, the UK has won the Eurovision Song Contest and for some reason (please go with me on this one) the BBC & EBU choose to hold the Contest in Scotland. Or… Scotland finally becomes indepedent and after a few NQs & close calls along the way we take our first victory all on our own. Either way, (hypothetical) Eurovision’s heading to Scotland.

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Even our national animal is utterly FLAGULOUS!

If this were to happen we’d no doubt have a similar bidding process to the one we’ve just seen for the Netherlands. Every city would have a bloody good go. Aberdeen, Dundee & Stirling would all throw their hats into the ring. For some reason unbeknownst to anyone somehere like Dumfries or Cumbernauld will pull a Masstricht and end up getting pretty close. In the end though, they’d pick the obivous choice of Glasgow. Given all the criteria considered for a host city, Glasgow seems almost ready made. It’s got the venue, the infrstructure and the proud locals who’d get behind it 100%. Roll on Glasgow 202…(inset final digit in future)

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Glasgow Euroclub’s already sorted! Credit: Ne Party Pas/Ellie Chalkley

My hometown of Edinburgh would undoubtedly pull an Amsterdam. We’ve got loads of other stuff going on throughout the year and as I’ve made clear the Glaswegians would have it in the bag. It’s not 1972 anymore, the capital sadly isn’t in a place to host the modern Contest. With no obvious venue to host I never thought I’d end up seeing my city bedecked in Contest paraphernalia. That was until Netflix came along.

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Eurovision flags at the ACTUAL bus stop I use near my ACTUAL work in ACTUAL Edinburgh

Whatever you think of the idea of Will Ferrell’s Eurovision parody (I’ll come to that shortly) the fact it’s brought Eurovision branding to my doorstep has been utterly marvellous. Given the fact the EBU have leant the official logo has at least given the film realisitc looking isignia. Then we have the slogan. In “Perfect Harmony” the writers of the film have hit upon a slogan that’s as good as, if not a tad better, than some of the more recent efforts. These set dressings certainly look as convincing as any other Contest, it certainly has the trappings of a real Eurovision.

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Princes Street looking awfy bonnie.

The convincing brading is for me an indication, albiet a slight one, that the movie isn’t going to be the tremendous flop many others have already declared. From what has been released thus far it feels like what Blades of Glory is to figure skating this movie will be to Eurovision. It will probably make sweeping generalisations and deal in pretty broad humour. However, at the heart of BoG is an affection for figure skating prompting huge names in the sport like Nancy Kerrigan and Scott Hamilton to lend their likeness.

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Scott Hamilton, a giant in the world of figure skating.

Through appearances in Lisbon & Tel Aviv it would certainly seem Ferrell has been doing the research. With authentic branding the filmakers are trying to make it look real. Will Netflix, Will Ferrell and the Eurovision Song Contest come together in perferct harmony? We’ll just have to wait and see. However, given the fact every year we afford the benefit of the doubt to 40 odd broadcasters to put together a package that’ll blow us all away come May, maybe we could afford this lot the same opportunity.

Dodgy blonde wig aside.

 

 

 

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